How to get an in depth Review...?

It's not bad. It could use a little more detail, and some of the details given early on, such as her leg position, seemed confusing to me the first time I read it until I realized the position they were in and THEN it made sense. Things I'd change, probably bot have Sarah stuttering so much around Ian, it makes her seem nervous rather than excited, though once he's inside her it makes sense because she's having difficulty breathing and talking at the same time. Anyway it's not bad for a one-shot but like a lot of folks I can tell you I'd want more, so be prepared to flesh it out some or come up with a few more chapters.